Surrendering affirms that we are no longer willing to live in pain. It expresses a deep desire to transcend our struggles & transform our negative emotions. I surrender saying, even though things are not exactly how I'd like them to be, I will face my reality. I will look at it directly in the eye and allow it to be here. I am choose to trust that there is a greater plan for me and that if I just surrender it will unfold in time. Surrender is the gift I am giving myself, it's an act of faiths it's saying that even though I can't see where this river is flowing, I completely trust it – and I surrender to something greater than myself ✨ . . . . . #omegainstitute #newyork #surrender #trust #love #chooselove #wholehearted #vulnerability #strength #water #flows #green #manifestlove #meditate #yogaeverydamnday #yogaeverywhere #vibration #raiseyourvibration #raiseyourfrequency #music #soulsearching #soulmate #loveyourself #selflove #beingpresent #myomegamoment #surrender #trust #feel #subtleenergy #marryyourvision #deepdesire #selflove

A post shared by Sadia Habiby (@sadia1313) on

Ah fall – the time where things can get a little hectic before they start flowing. After a blissful summer, filled up waves of high and lows, I am really looking forward to letting go to things and stagnant energy that no longer serves me. A huge component of the process for me is self love and self care. As part of that, I took a beautiful journey to upstate New York to spend a few days to Omega Institute for Holistic Healing. It’s so incredibly gorgeous out there – I enjoyed being out in nature, breathing fresh crisp air, being surrounded by amazing people and tuning into myself, and releasing limiting beliefs that are holding me from my deepest desires.

As I was sitting by the tree, enjoying a delicious cup of coffee (with oat milk, oh so good), after an incredible meditation session – a stranger who quickly became a friend came down and sat beside me. We didn’t indulge in small talk, and instead embraced conversation right away. We talked about consciousnesses, priorities, and that invisible stream of energy that binds humans together: love.

We talked about how It’s easy to fall in love with people who don’t love themselves. They’re vulnerable raw wounds who need saving, a job that happens to appeal to a lot of people. We like to feel needed. More importantly, we like to feel like we could be the missing piece of the puzzle for someone. We delight in the possibility that we could be the cure to whatever ails this person. As it happens, it’s nearly impossible to have a meaningful relationship with someone who has tragically low self-esteem.

It’s easy to spiral into this mindset: Let me love you. Let me take care of you. Let me put your needs before mine. All you have to do is want me in return. Rather than it feeling like a relationship between two equals, it will always be two people on different playing fields.

You exist to prop them up, to give them purpose. Meanwhile, they suck you dry.

They break your heart.

How can they ever fulfill your needs when they have trouble fulfilling their own? Ask yourself what kind of love you think you deserve. If you keep on finding yourself falling for damaged people, you have to wonder if you yourself are damaged. Otherwise, why would you subject yourself to this torture? Why do you want to give your future to someone who doesn’t treat you right? It’s like investing a lot in a money into lemon of a car. You can devote all your time to fixing this person up, to making them feel better about themselves, but in most cases, it’s just going to end up falling apart on you. And then all of this energy you’ve invested will add up to a person who simply can’t love you the way you need them to.

Or you resent them. You resent them for being so weak, even though that’s why you got into the relationship in the first place. But when you’re loving someone who doesn’t have any self-worth, you’re cheating yourself out of some extraordinary love. Big love, soul-stirring love. The kind of love that awakens the soul; that makes us be more of ourselves, that plants the fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds. There is an abundance of it in this beautiful world that we live in.

Paraphrased from Bob Marley; I truly believe that one day you can find someone who can turn your world around. You tell them things that you’ve never shared with another soul and they hang on to all your words and actually want to hear more.You share your deepest most treasured desires with them. When something wonderful happens, you can’t wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement. They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself. You show them your darkness and they love you anyway. Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even more beautiful than you already are. There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a sweet quiet calmness when they are around. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are. Exactly as you are. The things that may seem insignificant such as a text, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever. Colours seem brighter and more brilliant. You start seeing the world with HD vision. Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent. In their presence, there’s no need for continuous conversation, but you find you’re quite content in just having them nearby. The silence is beautiful, so comfortable and feels like home. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you. You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. You open your heart knowing that there’s a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible. (But it’s real!) You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that’s so real it scares you. But you feel safe. You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and a soul mate who will remain loyal to the very end.

It all starts and end with you. There is only you. So fill your life to the brim with love, and when big love does comes along, it going to fit oh so effortlessly. The greatest thing loving yourself means is that once you do, you’re better equipped to let the world love you as well.